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Relationships are tough. Marriage is a tough bitch. And it’s certainly not for everyone. As a lawyer, I have handled a few divorces. Thank goodness there is such an alternative for people trapped in horrible circumstances. But if you’re inclined to weather sickness and health, richer and poorer — and even if you’ve just met the person with whom you want to be in a longterm romance — bring a short memory and a long sense of humor. You’re gonna need it.
1. Burn your blueprint.
3. And forget.
4. Be a good teammate.
6. And adapt.
7. Find your faith.
8. Travel together.
9. Travel separately.
10. Develop your own interests.
11. Cultivate a wide, diverse circle of friends.
12. Don’t keep score.
14. Practice self-awareness.
15. Admit that you’re wrong (even, on occasion, when you aren’t).
16. Celebrate accomplishments big and small.
17. Surprise one another.
18. It’s the good little things.
19. And it’s the bad little things.
20. Cultivate your finer qualities.
21. The bathroom is private.
22. Talk about sex (but not just right before, during, or right after).
23. Encourage each other.
24. It’s okay to have secrets.
25. Avoid subtext.
26. Put it down.
27. Pick it up.
28. Don’t over-romanticize past (or future) relationships.
29. Never use the “s” word.
30. Offer solutions, not criticism.
32. You are equals.
33. Compliment each other.
34. Respect each other’s friends.
35. Know when to keep your mouth shut.
36. Indulge each other’s passions.
37. Lose your arbitrary moral code.
38. Respect space and time.
39. Take pride in your appearance.
40. Maintain good hygiene.
41. Ask before you throw it away.
42. Invite his/her family to special gatherings.
43. Speaking of family, everyone gets a holiday card and a birth announcement.
44. Don’t be petty.
45. Be self-sufficient.
46. Everything is fair game for a joke.
47. Have good manners.
48. Be responsible with money.
49. Remember to say thank you.
50. Adapting beats abandoning.