15 Things Guys Do That Turn Women Off.
Guys, have you ever been on a date and thought it was going well but the girl didn't lean in to meet you for a kiss or respond to any of your messages after that? Maybe it wasn't you, maybe it really was her. Maybe she just got out of a bad breakup and thought she was ready to start dating, only to find out later that she wasn't quite over it. Maybe she just wanted to get a free dinner. These are all possibilities. But in many cases, she probably just wasn't that into you (yes, it's our turn to say that).
Despite what people say, few women will actually turn a man down for his looks, not being handsome or tall or fit enough, for example. The real reason women turn down men is because they don't feel connected to them. Some connections are instant while others can be developed over time, and if the first doesn't happen, women are usually pretty good about determining whether or not the latter can.
You can usually tell if you're connecting with another person. The attraction is obvious. You're carrying on a conversation. There's chemistry. But sometimes, it might not be that simple for her. She'll look for different things to figure out whether or not you're truly compatible.
Continue reading to find some of the biggest turnoffs for women. You'll notice that they're not that different from the biggest turnoffs for men.
#1. So, who should pay the bill? It really depends.
Some men prefer to pay on the first date. Others go dutch or allow the girl to pay. As a general rule of thumb, the person who did the inviting should also pay the bill.
If you're paying and worried about spending too much, do your research and find a place where even if she orders the most expensive item on the menu, she won't be burning a hole in your pocket.
#2. Don't smother her with attention. Everyone needs a little breathing room.
We get it. You adore her and you probably have good reason to. You might want to shower her with gifts, kisses, and check up on her with messages and phone calls but find a balance. It's important to reassure your partner but women need their space. With that said, don't go as far as withholding your love. It isn't a game.
#3. There will be some girls who like to take charge but no one likes to take the reigns all the time.
You don't have to change who you are but just because you're a quiet or indecisive person doesn't make you incapable of making plans. Plan ahead if time is what you need. Show that you're an active member in the relationship.
#4. Unless you have an emergency, don't cancel on her.
Don't take it for granted when she sets aside some time for you. Last minute cancellations without good reason will be viewed as a red flag. If you have to cancel because your grandma is in the hospital, she'll understand and if she doesn't, her loss.
#5. She didn't sign up for a threesome so put that phone away.
Do not take your phone out at the dinner table. If you have a job where you're always on call, leave it in your pocket and set it on vibrate. Say "Excuse me" if you have to take a call.
If you're checking your phone or constantly taking photos, you aren't making that connection that you could be making. If you're at a restaurant, you might also be ruining the ambience for other guests.
#6. She'll notice the way you treat others, animals and waitstaff included.
My friend was on a date once and the guy slammed his fork down because the waiter had brought him an overcooked steak. When the waiter came over, he snapped at him and looked rather proud of it. Huge mistake. No one wants to date that guy. They don't call it being a gentleman for nothing, key word "gentle."
#7. If we constantly have to wait on you, it better be because you're unlucky and not because you're a poor planner.
Some people have real emergencies. One time, I was late to a date because I saw a stray dog out on a main road and didn't want him to get hit. I spent half an hour chasing after it and was fortunate enough to find his owner.
But most people are late because they don't plan well. It doesn't matter if you live in a small town or a big city, you can always look up what traffic is going to be like if you don't already know. Show her that you're a man of his word. Seven o'clock means seven o'clock.
#8. We won't wait forever for video game addicts to change.
Maybe it's just a hobby or maybe you're a pro gamer. It's one thing to play for an hour or two at the end of a busy work day but if you tell her you're too busy to see her because you want to make it to the next level in your video game, don't expect her to want to make it to the next level with you.
The good news for video game addicts is that men aren't the only ones. If this lifestyle is extremely important to you, find a girl who values the same things. That way, it can be something that you do together.
#9. We don't care what anyone says, poor hygiene doesn't make you a real man.
If you're an athlete or just have poor body odor, try to do something about it. No, denial isn't a solution. It doesn't matter if you have a rock hard body, most women will prefer a man that showers. At the very least, shower, use deodorant, and brush your teeth. Keep some mints and hand sanitizer in your car just in case.
#10. Your footwear will matter to some women.
Did you know that women are twice as likely to judge a man's shoes? We don't look at your shoes to see how much you're worth. Shoes can sometimes give us a glimpse into the kind of person you are.
If you wear flip flops, you might be seen as easygoing. If you're in oxfords, you might be seen as stylish or business ready, depending on the oxford.
Whatever shoes you choose to wear, make sure they're clean and free of holes. We don't want to see your socks at dinner.
#11. We don't want partners that are obsessed with social media.
We're all guilty of indulging ourselves in some forms of social media but if it interferes with relationship, there will be problems. To us, it's a sign that you might not be ready for a meaningful relationship.
#12. Don't be a scrub.
Ah, money. It's one of the biggest issues in many relationships. Let's face it. There will be times when you'll have to borrow money from your partner. It isn't a deal breaker if you simply forgot to bring cash at a cash only venue or if you're going through a rough patch. Couples stick together through the good times and the bad but if you aren't actively trying to better your situation, you're doing something wrong. You can't be dependent on her forever.
#13. When was the last time you asked about us? If you can't remember, check yourself.
Some people can be so caught up in themselves that they don't stop to ask about their partners. Relationships are meant to be two-way, the good ones at least. If you're not interested in your parter as a person, what's the point?
#14. Don't rush us into doing anything we don't want to.
It doesn't matter how horny you are, it is never okay to assume or force us into sex. It's important to figure out what both parties are looking for at the very beginning. If we're both looking for a serious relationship, pace yourself.
#15. No one likes being around a negative Nancy, and yes, men can be negative Nancys.
If you're feeling down, be honest about it. We'll be there for you. But if all you do is blame other people, you're being disrespectful. There will be times when other people really are assholes but in the end, the way you respond shows a lot about your character.